The Imperfect Caregiver by Bobbi Carducci

Welcome to my blog – The Imperfect Caregiver. My name is Bobbi Carducci and for seven years I was the primary caregiver for my father-in-law, Rodger Carducci. When my mother-in-law passed away one of the first things people asked was, “Who will take care of Rodger?” For my husband and me the answer was easy. He was coming to live with us. We had discussed and planned for the time when one or more of our parents would need our help. We were building a new, larger home despite the fact that our once crowded nest was now empty. There would be plenty of room for one or two more if and when the time came.

The house was still under construction when our mothers died within nine weeks of one another. We were devastated and reeling with loss but the knowledge that Rodger needed us kept us going. We would do everything we could to comfort him and provide a safe and loving home for him.

We didn’t know how ill he already was and how much care he was going to need as his condition became more and more complicated. Creative problem solving on the run is how I describe what I did every day for the next seven years. I cried, I got angry sometimes, I did a lot of praying, and had more than a few glasses of wine. Eventually I learned there is no right way to do this job and you don’t have to get it right every time in order to provide loving care to those who need you the most.

Every month I will share stories from my experiences and those of others who have been in our shoes in the hope you will learn from my mistakes and their wisdom while you take heart in knowing you are not alone.

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