You Don’t Have to be Saint


During the time I was a caregiver and even now, after reading Confessions of an Imperfect Caregiver, people tell me I must be a saint.  Always I assure them that I am not now nor I have I ever been saintly. Rodger would have been one of the first to agree with me.

None of us are saints. We are people dealing with dreadful situations brought on by terrible diseases. There is reason to be angry and resentful and less than perfect.  There are even more reasons to quit. To walk away and let someone else deal with it. There is only one reason to carry on. Someone we care about needs care. It’s as simple and as complicated as that.

Maybe there is no one else is able to do it. Maybe no one else is willing to do it. The reasons are many.  But you are the one doing it and you are the one putting the needs of another before your own. That is not saintliness. There is no expectation of perfection or being prayerful or holy.  That is selflessness.

Selflessness is what keeps you going in all your glorious imperfection. Making it up as you go along. Stumbling and picking yourself up as you do the best you can.  Reaching out to the person in your care at the start of every new day. Yes, you are the embodiment of selflessness and probably no more a saint than I am and that’s a very good thing.

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